And if You Only Knew
by sylvanisty
Summary: There are moments in everyone's lives that they wish they could take back. But it is in these moments that we realize who we are and who we are meant to be. Nobody said it would be easy. Usagicentered.
1. Prologue

Sorry had to upload again becaus is pissing me off grrr oh well. Hey guys, I know I should be updating Rain of Tears and I will eventually but I'm not in the mood to write another chapter right now. Anyway, I thought of this idea in my head and decided to get it out. Tell me what you think. :-D. Oh and everyone should listen to "the last man" from The Fountain (good movie by the way) soundtrack, very beautiful song. Disclaimer: don't own Sailormoon or Gundam Wing

ooooooooooooo Prologue ooooooooooooo

"Just tell me!" Usagi exclaimed. "Just tell me...", she choked out. Tears clung to her lashes, threatening to fall.

"Some things should be left alone." his cold reply seared her heart.

"Just let me in Heero, please. Why can't you just trust me?" Usagi reasoned.

"The things I've done... you would never forgive me."

"How do you know? Just give me a chance. You have to trust me Heero. I love you, isn't that enough?" Usagi cried.

"No! Don't you understand? Love isn't enough. love is never enough!" Heero snapped, his Prussian blue eyes flashed at her disheveled appearance.

Usagi recoiled. "You're wrong."

Her words hung in the air as she turned her back to him and started walking towards the door. She looked over her shoulder at him, her sky blue eyes sparkling with sadness "I can't be with someone who won't trust me, who won't let me in... Is this what you want, for me to leave?" she asked.

"Whether you leave or not is up to you." once again there was no emotion in his words and Usagi squashed a sob.

How could he be so callous, after three years together. Heero, the same man who held her like she was all that mattered, who would laugh at her jokes no matter how ridiculous they were, was now treating her like she was a stranger. How had things gotten this bad? Could she even remember when it began? Had it been when he stopped coming home at seven or when he stopped returning a majority of her phone calls? Their relationship had been disintegrating for months; she should have expected it would come to this. Heero had been closing himself off from her and there was nothing she could do. Yet she didn't want to let go, with all her heart, she didn't want to leave him. Her heart cried to be held in his arms once more, but her mind was made up and the next words out of her mouth seemed to betray the very core of who she was.

"You're right it is up to me" Usagi replied in a deceivingly calm voice.

"Goodbye Heero".

And with that she turned her back towards him and walked out of his life.

Little did she know, by walking out that door, she would be starting the turn of events that would change everyone's lives. Thrusting secrets, feelings, and lies out into the open and bringing everything to a startling climax that no one would ever expect.

oooooooooooo

Ok well short prologue, just introducing Heero and Usagi and what they mean to each other. There will be some flashbacks into their relationship in the next chapter I think. I have a rough idea of what I want to happen. We'll see how it goes. Review and tell me what you think, because I want to know if it's worth continuing or not. the next chapter will be much longer I promise lol 


	2. Chapter One

Another chapter up, I know the last one was really short so I tried to make this one long. Hope you like it :-D

Disclaimer: Don't own Sailormoon or Gundam Wing

ooooooooooooooo  
Chapter One  
ooooooooooooooo

_  
Goodbye Heero_

Heero groaned, and rested his head in his hands, trying to forget her. But everywhere he turned she was there; on the counter, the refrigerator, in the bedroom. Small things like a watch or a hair band, items that would normally be innocuous, but each item held a memory of her and he could not forget.

Oh, what a fool he was to want her back now. But he couldn't forget her face and her words before she walked out of his apartment and his life. He had caused her to leave and apparently love wasn't enough otherwise she would have stayed right? But in the end could he blame her? He was not ignorant to her unhappiness the last couple of months before the breakup.

He had become more withdrawn but not for the reason she assumed. The Preventers had recently discovered evidence supporting rumors of a new organization. An organization rumored to be strong enough to start another war. It had soon become The Preventers top priority to track down every rumor's source and terminate the problem before it got any worse.

Naturally, Heero had begun spend a lot of time with Relena Peacecraft, an old friend and perhaps flame as may be viewed by some. And while Usagi didn't know for what reason he was gone a lot, she would be an idiot not to notice the hint of perfume on his clothes every time he came home or the phone messages left by her.

It was only natural for her to assume he was having an affair. But all that was trivial to the real reason of their fight: Heero's past. His absence had brought up the unspoken issue that settled uncomfortably in between them since the beginning of their relationship and it was a subject Heero avoided at all costs. Some things were best left alone and buried.

His years of fighting and killing now only remained as faded nightmares in the back of his mind. How could sweet Usagi, who cried when he once accidentally killed a butterfly, ever accept this Heero who killed his target without any mercy for those in the way? A young girl flashed before his memory at the thought.

She stood in the middle of destruction, collapsed buildings surrounded her. He still remembered her forlorn face, wisps of dirty hair blowing around her face and her eyes boring right through to his soul before she was blasted into smithereens. He hadn't even flinched.

Heero let out another groan and shook the memory away. Perhaps it was best they were split, if another war was truly on the horizon then he wanted her as far away from him as possible for her protection. She wouldn't have loved the real him anyway he finally reasoned.

But in the back of his mind the question 'how do you know?' lingered like a phantom unwilling to leave until answered and Heero fiercely ignored it. But even then he couldn't stop the wild beating of his heart at the thought losing her for good and not knowing if they could have worked things out; if she would have forgiven him for his sins.

Yes some things were best left alone.

For good.

oooooooo

The incessant ringing of Usagi's cellphone one sunny Sunday morning lay untouched as Usagi stared up at the ceiling from her bed. Rays of lights passed through the half closed blinds, casting lines of light upon everything in the unkempt bedroom. How long had it been? Two weeks, three weeks, a month since her breakup with Heero?

Suddenly Usagi couldn't even recall when she had last eaten. All she could remember was that Heero didn't want her. He had just tossed her to the side like yesterday's news. And suddenly the old memories of being alone came rushing back to slap her in the face. How many times could she take being forgotten, left to struggle on by herself.

Usagi squeezed her eyes closed, trying to blink out the memories. Her cellphone stopped ringing, only to start up again three minutes later. Usagi grumbled and finally flipped open the phone.

"What?" Usagi mumbled. She winced, her voice coming out harsher than intended

"I've been trying to call you for the past week and all you can say is what?!" a high pitched voice cried in response. .

"Hey Rei" said Usagi

"Hey Rei? That's it? No ' I'm sorry for not calling you back Rei, you really are a great friend for calling me a thousand times to see how I'm doing'?"

"Yeah, well I've been busy" Usagi said defensively

"Right Usagi..." She said sarcastically, a moment of silence passed before she spoke again. "I heard about what happened"

"Oh? From who?" Usagi inquired nonchalantly but Usagi's heart did an unexpected lurch. How many people knew already? What did they think of her, knowing that she had holed herself up in her apartment over a guy? Then Usagi decided that she didn't care. She was allowed to do whatever she damn well pleased. Usagi smirked at the thought as she pictured a number of inappropriate things that she would never do.

"Wufei. We met up for coffee like a week ago...How are you feeling?" She asked. Usagi could hear the thick hesitation that laced her voice.

"Alright" She stated, taking care to leave out any hint of emotion.

"Don't lie to me." Rei scolded. Usagi heard her breathe a long sigh a second later. "Usagi, you need to get up, get some clothes on and meet me for lunch. You can't stay in that apartment forever. He's not worth it ok? I know you love him but any guy that would treat you the way he did doesn't deserve a second thought. So enough moping."

"I am not moping, I'm just tired so maybe some other time Rei, just not today" pleaded Usagi. By this time, Usagi had pushed herself up into a sitting position against her bed's headboard and held the cell tightly against her ear.

"Usagi Tsukino you get your butt out of that bed before I march over there and drag you out of it myself!" Rei snapped.

"Ok, ok I'm getting up" Usagi lied.

"Good, I'll be over there in an hour so you better be ready. Ok bye!" Rei rapidly announced.

"Hey! What-" but Rei had already shut off her line.

Great, just great. Why did she have to have a friend who cared about her and leave her alone? Couldn't she be like everyone else's and not give a shit? Usagi smiled, despite herself, at the thought. The day Rei didn't give a shit was the day the Earth stopped spinning on its axis. If there could be one word to describe Rei it would be passionate. Rei, who not only acted passionate but looked it, with her ebony hair and violet eyes and whose stare was enough to make guys stop in their tracks.

She wondered what Rei would have done in her situation and figured it certainly would not be laying around a dead fish waiting and waiting... but waiting for what? Was she waiting for something? Usagi sighed and came to a decision. Rei was right. She was better than this.

And with reluctance, Usagi realized she had become the very girl she hated, the girl who relied upon the men in her life to make her happy. If Heero didn't need her then she didn't need him. With that mind set in place, Usagi leapt out of bed with a renewed sense of purpose, grabbed a shirt and jeans, and dashed for the bathroom but not before slipping on a stray piece of clothing.

Usagi screamed as her body was momentarily suspended in the air before falling to the ground with a harsh thud

"Oww" Usagi moaned. 'Some things never change' thought Usagi.

Around forty five minutes later Usagi was dressed and ready to go. Donning a crisp white tank top, some blue jeans and tennis shoes, Usagi made her way over into her living room, plopped herself down on the couch, grabbed the remote and flipped on the TV. "In other news, vice foreign minister of Earth Relena Peacecraft met today with representatives from each of the colonies. The topic of their meeting is still under wraps, but according to some close sources…" Usagi quickly changed the channel but not before catching a glimpse of _her_.

Relena Peacecraft.

With honey hued eyes, cascading dirty blonde hair, full figured, and an intelligence to be reckoned with. She was the perfect girl. What man could deny her and the presence she emitted? 'She's the pinnacle of what every woman strives to be' Usagi thought bitterly.

And she was almost positive that it was her Heero had been sleeping with behind her back. She had only met her a couple of times but it was obvious the feelings she had for him. Usagi's heart constricted at the thought of Heero holding Relena like he held her. Did he tell Relena he loved her, that she was the only woman for him, that-- 'stop it!' Usagi commanded herself. 'Just stop thinking about it'. Usagi buried her head in her hands as she felt fresh tears begin to travel their way down her cheeks.

"Damnit" Usagi muttered.

She couldn't even think about him without crying. How was she going to handle seeing him again? It was inevitable, Usagi knew that. That's what happens when you were in the same circle of friends.

You couldn't avoid each other even if you tried. A knock at the door interrupted Usagi's thought. Figuring Rei must have arrived, Usagi wiped away her tears and opened the door.

"Hey-" Rei's smile immediately turned into a frown. "What's wrong?" She asked.

Usagi sniffled, "Nothing just being ol' crybaby Usagi again".

"Oh come on, you are not a crybaby... or at least you haven't been since high school" Rei smiled.

Her joke was received with a friendly punch and smile. "Thanks for coming over Rei"

"Hey, no problem. Anyway, there's a new cafe down the street that has excellent food and I knew you would like it. So come on." Rei put on a smile and led Usagi out the door.

"This wouldn't happen to be the same cafe you ate at with a certain Wufei Chang would it?" Usagi asked slyly. Usagi had suspected that they were more than friends, but Rei was very discreet and private about who she liked and had a relationship with, making it nearly impossible to confirm anything.

Rei blushed. "Maybe. We're just friends Usagi. You know that". Usagi was surprised. 'Rei blushing? Rei never blushes. Something has to be up' Usagi thought.

"And I'm sure that's what you tell him too after every time you screw huh?" Usagi's voice held the hint of teasing, but she was also testing her, waiting for her response.

"What?" Rei exclaimed, caught off guard.

Usagi laughed, "I'm just kidding". 'Interesting' Usagi thought. Instead of shrugging the comment off, she was acting like someone who had something to hide.

Rei laughed nervously, "Yeah, just kidding…right."

It wasn't Rei's words that caused Usagi stop suddenly and stare at Rei, who in turn stopped too, but the meaning behind them. There was definitely something up and then it dawned on her.

"You _are_ screwing him aren't you?" Usagi gasped.

"Look-" Rei raised her hand to stop the next words coming out of Usagi's mouth.

"For how long?" Usagi cut her off. Rei dropped her hand and started walking again, ignoring the question. Usagi followed her, walking pace for pace. After a few minutes of silence she answered

"For about a month."

"A month! So is this like a relationship or just a friends with benefits thing?" Usagi asked. Usagi couldn't help but feel slightly betrayed. Why had Rei not told her? They were best friends; that's what best friends did, they told each other things. But then again, she was not one to be throwing stones was she.

Rei had to practically drag her from her apartment to get her to talk, and besides it wasn't Usagi who told her about...Heero. The thought calmed Usagi's feelings a bit.

"I don't know Usagi... I honestly don't know. It just happened, and then it kept happening. Besides I don't think either of us wants a real relationship." Rei decided. Usagi took a closer look at Rei. It had been almost a month since she had seen Rei but she noticed a differance.

Rei was falling for him, and suddenly her words took on a new meaning. She knew exactly how Rei felt about Wufei. Rei wanted a relationship, but it was a touchy subject. One a lot of people didn't want to talk about, even if they were bestfriends. How do you tell your best friend that she man she loved didn't want anything serious? And her eyes, endless depths of swirling violet, held uncertainty that Usagi had never seen before. It scared her.

"Why not?" Why wouldn't Wufei want a relationship with Rei? Usagi's anger flared. Men. Who did they think they were? It was obvious Rei wanted more and didn't want anyone to know. Especially Wufei

"I don't know, things just get too complicated I guess. Anyway enough talking about our love lives. Let's talk about something more cheerful..." Rei cast a furtive glance at Usagi, her lips curved into a sly smile before continuing. "Like Ami coming back in town perhaps?"

Rei's suspenseful words were rewarded by Usagi leaping in the air from surprise, shock etched onto her face. "What! She's coming back? When?"

"In a few days I think. That group she's involved in just got finished with some of their research over in Germany and she'll be heading back soon."

"Only some? She's been there for over six months now. What the hell are they researching that would take so long?" Usagi demanded to no one in particular. Ami was smart, extremely smart in fact, but she was also very secretive when it came to her work, making Usagi feel slightly uneasy and suspicious. Her old instincts told her to investigate but her conscience refused.

Ami was her friend and she would keep her word and stay out of Ami's business. Besides, it wasn't like it was information that could decide the fate of Earth itself. 'Famous last words' Usagi told herself, amused.

"I don't know, top secret remember? Anyways how's your new advertising job going?" Rei changed the subject. Something she was very good at.

"Good I guess. I would have never gotten it if it hadn't been for Quatre's help" Usagi admitted. Quatre happened to be one of Usagi's good friends. In fact, it was through him she met Heero. She was Quatre's date for a business party when she had first laid eyes on him. The chemistry was poignant from the first time they spoke. And Quatre quickly moved aside for Heero to move in. Quatre was never one to be in the way of two people's feelings for each other.

Usagi never asked him why he did it. Why he just stepped aside. Usagi just assumed Quatre was just being a good friend and left it at that. Usagi always wondered if she had never met Heero, where Quatre and she would be now; would they be married? Usagi's thoughts ventured, Usagi choked back a laugh. Quatre and she were too much a like; they would have never worked Usagi reasoned. Though he wasn't bad to look at Usagi admitted to herself. He held an air of authority about him without being overbearing. It was for this reason that people seemed to flock to him.

His platinum blonde hair framed his delicate face and standing at six good feet of lean muscle, he was hardly someone could just pass by on the streets without a second glance.

"Well he does own the company so I'm sure it helped. Have you gone into work at all these past couple of weeks?" Rei asked

"Uh no, I took advantage of my unused sick days to just get away. Quatre said he understood, just as long as I wasn't gone too long." Usagi explained.

"Well that was nice of him" Rei replied offhandedly

Their conversation came to a halt temporarily as they finally reached the small cafe located snugly on a corner. It looked cozy and wasn't too crowded. Flowers were planted everywhere and anywhere. The building itself was painted a pale orange, and intended cracks graced the walls to give the cafe a worn down atmosphere. Usagi couldn't help but feel at home.

"You're right. It is nice" Usagi agreed.

"I told you so". Rei replied smugly. Taking their seats, they opened their menus and waited patiently for a waiter.

ooooooooo

It had been three months and Heero had managed to avoid her. But despite not being able to see or talk to her, He made Wufei keep tabs on her through Rei. Heero sat languidly at his desk in his office located directly in the center of Preventers headquarters. The office was bathed in the dim light coming from the lamp on his desk. Heero's face was illuminated by it, and from the outside observer, it was obvious he hadn't slept well for days. Heero directed his gaze into the shadows.

To anyone else, all they would see was darkness, but to Heero he clearly saw his partner Wufei who stood leaning up against the wall next to the door, arms crossed.

"So…anything new?" Heero asked finally. Heero tried to keep a nonchalant air to his question but internally cursed himself when concern came through.

"Nothing worth mentioning" Wufei replied. The silence grew thick until the tension was almost palpable. Wufei grew impatient. "Seriously Heero, what are you getting at? Why are you doing this? Cause it's fucking immature if you ask me", Wufei bit out.

Heero glared, "You know as well as I do that she would only get in the way. I can't have her near me if there's a new organization out there and their main goal to either kill or capture all of us". Heero reasoned harshly, and crossed him arms. Wufei didn't understand, and Heero was growing irritated. No one seemed to understand why he let Usagi go. But his reasons were enough and they would have to live with it.

"First of all, we don't even know if there's a new organization. Second of all, who says they want to capture us. It's been ten goddamn years Heero. With the advances made in technology, we'd be useless to them now. And third of all, you love her you idiot!" Wufei snapped. Wufei was never one to keep his opinions to himself, even if they weren't exactly nice, and he wasn't about to let Heero off the hook because they were best friends.

"Don't be so hasty to make such assumptions Wufei. The worst thing you can do is underestimate your opponents. And if there is a new organization claiming to be as strong as they say then who do you think the Preventers first choice in soldiers is going to be?", Heero demanded.

Wufei pushed himself off the wall and stalked over to the desk. Leaning his hands on the table, he bent his head forward till he was eye level with Heero's stormy gaze. "Fine, you may have a point. But listen to me, just talk to her. Become friends again at least, instead of having me spy on her for you. You know she thinks you're having an affair with Relena don't you?"

"I know. And Relena's been as happy as can be since we've broken up too. She won't leave me alone." Heero replied bitterly.

Wufei's eyes narrowed. "I know you don't love Relena. But don't tell me you've slept with her" Wufei asked incredulously, a light dawning on him.

"Not that it's any of your business, but yes, a couple of times." Heero stated. He wouldn't deny it; he had slept with her more than once since the breakup. But he felt nothing for her. Part of Heero told him he should feel bad for leading Relena on, but the other part of him wanted to damn her. If Relena hadn't more than once made it clear to Usagi that she had feelings for him then perhaps Usagi wouldn't have thought they were having an affair.

He cared for Relena, but he felt only feelings one would have for a long time friend.

"Well then I guess Usagi wasn't so far off the point then was she?" Wufei replied, sarcasm practically dripping off from his voice.

"Don't throw stones when you yourself live in a glass house. A certain dark haired woman comes to mind." Heero pointed out.

"Heh, well this isn't about me, it's about you. How will you feel when Usagi finds someone else?" Wufei asked. Wufei suddenly stood up and started pacing the length of the room, clearly agitated. Heero's eyes followed his every move with calculating precision.

"She won't." Heero stated with an air of finality.

"Oh? Do you think she's going to sit around waiting for you to throw her a bone? There are plenty of guys out there who would probably just love to have a piece of her." Wufei said sarcastically

"Shut up Wufei" growled Heero. His words held warning but Wufei didn't care. He wasn't about to leave the subject alone.

"No. Honestly Heero. What would you do if she did find someone?" Wufei insisted.

"I'd wish her the best" Heero replied calmly. 'You're an idiot' Heero's conscience told him. Heero pushed the thought aside.

Wufei stopped and stared at Heero, eyes narrowed. "Liar".

Heero didn't answer though, instead he got up and walked towards the door, opened it, but not before looking over at Wufei.

"You're right I am a liar. I don't know what I would do. But hopefully I'll never have to find out." And with that Heero left his office leaving a calculating Wufei behind.

oooooooooooooo

Relena sighed from exhaustion and rubbed her sleepy eyes as she leaned back in her chair to take a break. Papers lay scattered everywhere. It was well past twelve o'clock at night and she wasn't nearly finished. 'Just an average day in Relena Peacecraft shoes' Relena thought bitterly.

The Preventers had been working her to the bone. Though she herself wasn't actually in the Preventers, she worked with them as their representative which just happened to include hours of paperwork, research, and on top of that she had to make sure peace treaties and negotiations continued to go smoothly between Earth and the colonies.

The rumors of another organization had been running her ragged. Relena didn't know if she could handle another war.

The thought of so many innocent people dying once more to reach an unattainable goal made her sick to her stomach. Then there was the fact that Heero would most assuredly be the first one out on the battlefield that frightened Relena. She almost lost him once; she didn't want to lose him again.

But then again, he wasn't really hers anyway Relena thought bitterly. He was Usagi's, well at least until a few months ago. But no matter how many times Heero brought her to his bed, she knew he would never be hers.

More than once he called out Usagi's name during their throws of passion, and more than once he didn't answer her back when she told him she loved him. Relena frowned; why had she fallen for such an emotionless asshole? She had known him ten years and never had she heard him utter the words I love you except to Usagi.

It made her blood curl and her jealousy flare to life. As nice as Usagi was, sometimes Relena just wished she had never come into any of their lives.

oooooooooo

The sun was setting. A myriad of magentas and fuchsia colors swirled around each other, casting a glow on everything in winner corp. Usagi grabbed her black wool coat and exited the building. She had been back at work for a month now and had settled comfortably back into a regular work mode. Quatre made sure not to mention Heero's name whenever they talked. In fact, he made her feel as if nothing happened, and she was grateful for his support. Usagi's cellphone went off a second later. Flipping it open, Usagi said "Hello?"

"Hey, It's me" Ami chimed. Ami had been back in town for over a month now but the two of them had barely spent anytime together. Ami was still working like a dog at where ever she went every morning much to Usagi's displeasure.

"Hey, what's up?" Usagi replied.

"Oh, Rei and I were wondering if you wanted to hit the town with us tonight. There's this club downtown that's supposed to be really nice. It'll be a fun girl's night out. So what do you say?" Ami asked.

'That's weird' Usagi thought. Ami actually wanted to go out and join the human race. Usagi laughed at the thought.

"What? Did I hear what I thought I heard? Ami wanting to take a break from work?" Usagi teased.

"Ha ha, very funny Usagi. So are you up for it?" She asked.

Usagi groaned. She wasn't planning on going anywhere tonight and the thought of having to get ready made her feel lazier than ever. Besides, Usagi had been avoiding going out more than necessary for awhile. She just couldn't get herself in the mood to hang out with a lot of people lately.

"I don't know Ames. I'm not really in the mood" Usagi admitted.

"You say that every time. Come on, just this once. Please?" Ami begged.

Usagi sighed. "I guess I could go for a little while…" Usagi gave up. She was actually just planning a quiet night at home alone watching old movies and eating popcorn. But maybe it was about time she got out and had some fun.

"Great! Rei and I'll be picking you up around nine alright?"

Usagi laughed, "Ok sure. Later Ami"

"Bye!" Ami replied.

Usagi thought back to her neglected wardrobe at her apartment. How was she going to find anything to wear in that forest of clothes was beyond her. With that thought in mind, Usagi left Winner Corp. office building and hailed a taxi. People and things blurred by faster than Usagi could think as Usagi sat in the backseat of a taxi car.

The last time she had been out had been over a month ago... Suddenly the more Usagi thought about hitting the town tonight, the more excited she became.

But beneath all the excitement, a feeling of foreboding had managed to coil itself around in Usagi's stomach.

ooooooooooo

Ok that's it for now, sort of long I hope :-D. Anyways, I'll try to update this regularly. Read and review I would love to hear everyone's thoughts and constructive criticism. Oh yeah and hopefully will stop being jerks and put my fic up where it should be grrr :-).


	3. Chapter Two

Hey guys, I'm back. story is going to be in 1st person POV from now unless I feel like changing it. Anyway, enjoy:-) And don't forget to review

Disclaimer: I do not own sailormoon or gundam wing

oooooooooooooooooooo

The club was definitely crowded as I made my way over to the bar, brushing up against at least two dozen strangers. I grimaced, for one stranger, in particular, was very sweaty. gross. I spotted Rei and Ami sitting on nearby stools.

"Hey!" I yelled over the music to catch their attention. They simultaneously turned their heads.

Rei broke out into a grin, "Hey, you look great!", Ami nodded in agreement.

I felt my cheeks heat up, damnit why could i ever learn to just take a compliment gracefully. "So do you two guys" I replied.

Ami laughed, "Well I would hope so, I only took two hours to get ready for tonight".

"Really? Why so long?" I asked.

"Well I never get out anymore, work you know, so I decided to take some time on my appearance for a change."

"Well, it definitely paid off" Rei said.

"Thanks, well I'm off to go dance, you two coming?" Ami got up from her stool.

"You bet" Rei replied. They both looked over at me.

"You two guys go ahead. I think I'm going to get a drink first".

"Awww, well whatever floats your boat. Come on Ami. We'll be back later okay?"

"Yeah, sure. no problem." I replied. As soon as the two disappeared into the crowd, I grabbed myself a stool.

"Anything I can get ya?" the bartender asked.

"Umm, how about.. a scotch on the rocks I guess." I decided.

"Sure, coming right up", he replied before turning away.

He was pretty cute for a bartender, and not too old, I contemplated. Maybe a bit too rough around the edges for me though. 'wait, what am I thinking?' I was not going to check out guys. I had already decided earlier that tonight was just about having fun and that meant no guys allowed. Well, guys were unavoidable in a club, but interaction would be kept to a bare minimum, I reasoned.

"Here ya go, name's Rick by the way", The bartender interrupted my thoughts.

"Thanks, nice to you meet you" I replied cordially.

"Hey, no problem. anything for a pretty lady such as yourself. With anybody tonight?" he winked. I inwardly sighed, just what i need, attention. Why did he have to put me on the spot, I'm never good when put on the spot.

"Uhh-". "Hey, Rick leave the poor girl alone.

"Can't you see she's not interested" a masculine voice interrupted. I felt the space beside me fill up and couldn't help but tense up.

The bartender Rick laughed and just shrugged, "Can't blame a guys for trying can ya?".

"I suppose not" he laughed. Hold on- I recognized that laugh. I turned sharply to look over at the stranger. my eyes widened in shock.

"What is there something on my face?". I ignored his comment, shrieked with pleasure and threw my arms around him.

"Well I'm glad to see you too babe", he replied encircling my waist with his arms. I felt his laugh rumble through his chest, and pressed myself closer to him, his hint of cologne filling up her senses and suddenly all the memories of him coming back.

"Duo, its been so long.."

"Only a year babe. Not too long".

"Hey, what did I tell you about calling me babe?", I frowned in mock seriousness as I took myself out of his embrace. Staring up at him, I could definitely tell the physical changes he had undergone in one year. He seemed taller, and if possible, more masculine than before. So much for the bare minimum of interactions with guys tonight, I realized. But Duo didn't really count; well he did, but he was like a brother, and he also happened to be Heero's bestfriend. I shook at head at this. Duo and Heero were complete opposites. It always confused me how they became so close...

"So.. what brings you here?".

I noticed a thoughtful look crossed Duo's features before answering. "I got homesick, decided it was time to come home for awhile.."

"Oh, well that's great. But I meant what brings you here.. as in this club?" I laughed. I didn't know how to feel. happy that was he home, or suspicious that out of all the places we could be, we run into each other here. Suddenly, the realization that he knew I would be here hit me like a brick. He wasn't here, at some bar, to have some fun and drink. Oh no, he was here to talk about none other Heero Yui. Well he obviously had another thing coming. He must have seen my expression because he opened his mouth before i had even finished my thoughts.

"Look.. I heard about you and Heero. I think you should talk to him" He said quickly. And those were pretty much the last words I wanted to hear. How dare he try to fix our relationship. It was none of his business! I felt my anger take over. Duo was at it again, whenever there was trouble between me and Heero, he had to be there to fix it. Well you know what, he couldn't fix everything. Why did he have to be such a good friend?

"Well as nice as that sounds, I have better things to talk about than some emotionless, cheating prick" I said, venom practically dripping from my words. Was I really that angry at Heero, why couldn't I get over him?.

"Cheating? Heero wouldn't do that to you, I promise. He loves-"

"Just shutup Duo! You've been gone for a whole, entire year. How would you even know how Heero is." I yelled. The room suddenly felt hot, and it was becoming hard to breathe. I could already see several glances directed towards us. I felt their gazes bore into me and i suddenly wanted to be anywhere but here. I turned sharply, preparing to run as fast as I could, the door clearly in sight.

"Wait-" I felt his hand dig into my arm and twirl me around. I felt the heat of Duo's blue eyes bore into mine; I felt like I had a fever. Too many feelings at once I concluded. If i didn't get out of here soon, I would probably go into emotional shock. If that was even possible. "Don't you dare run from me Usagi. Please, just listen to me. Heero's been horrible these past few months. All you have to do is look at him and you can tell how unhappy he is..."

I just wanted him to stop. Stop saying his name, stop staring at me like that. Just stop. "That's not my problem" I tried to sound angry but failed because it came out as someone who knew they were defeated. Duo's gaze on me softened. 'Stay angry at me damnit, so I can stay angry at you'. But I knew that as heated as this argument was, it was over.

"Usagi, I just want to see you happy"

I sighed, and smiled weakly. "I know Duo. Thanks for caring I guess.."

He laughed weakly and pulled me into a shallow embrace, breaking apart a couple of seconds later.

"So you'll talk to him?" Duo's said hopefully. Man, he just didn't know how to give up. But how could I say no when he was looking at me like I just happened to know the answer to the universe. Oh yeah, i knew how. Just imagine Heero and Relena getting it on behind my back. The image, now forever burned in my memory, worked perfectly. There was no way in hell I was crawling back to him.

"No, I won't Duo. I can't, I just can't..."

Now it was time for Duo to sigh. "Fine... for now. But I can promise you Usagi, I will make you talk to him, even if i have to kidnap you both and lock you two in a closet".

Obviously doubting he would ever be able to keep that promise I laughed. "whatever Duo".

"Duo!" Rei's voice cut into our conversation. She suddenly emerged from the mass of bodies, sweaty but glowing. Someone had been dancing a little too much it seemed, but I smiled none the less. Even sweaty she was gorgeous.

"I didn't you know you'd be here. By the way, you left your jacket over at Wufei's house. Might want to pick that up later. Still has that stain that Trowa spilt all over it. Seeing Trowa drunk is probably the most hilarious thing I'll ever remember" She laughed.

Wait, what?

Duo joined in her laughter. "Yeah well I can live with a ruined jacket. Sorry I had to leave early. Quatre ended up having to cart Trowa home huh?"

"Yeah, he did" She responded.

Ok, now I was thoroughly confused. And somewhat hurt. They had gotten together without me? Deep into whatever conversation they were having about some party that I Rei's bestfriend wasn't invited to, I couldn't help but feel out of place. Had I really been so secluded that everyone was moving on without me? Well there was only one way to find out.

"What are you two talking about?" my voice came out meeker than I was expecting. They both looked at me surprised. They had totally forgotten I was even there.

"Oh..." Rei suddenly became quiet and an awkward silence settled between us.

Duo cut in after a couple of seconds, "We just had a little get together a couple of days ago that's all, nothing big".

'Big enough for everyone but me' I thought somewhat bitterly.

"Yeah, I was going to invite you but I figured you'd say no... Heero being there and all...".

"Oh? that's nice. Well I'm sure it was fun" I smiled. Not. So, Heero gets invited and I don't, how was that fair? He was the one that cheated on me.

"Yeah, it was alright. Trowa got really drunk and you know how he doesn't drink." Rei laughed weakly.

"Yeah I know.." I said. Of course I knew, Trowa happened to be one of my friends as was Quatre and Wufei, well maybe not so much Wufei but... It was partly my fault I knew. I couldn't really blame Rei for not including me, she was the one that forced me out of the apartment in the first place. But it hurt to know that life just kept going on, that it didn't stop for anybody. Staring at how Duo and Rei were, I realized I missed them, all of my friends who I had neglected.

Well, no more. From here on out it would be different I decided. No more moping, enough thinking about Heero. I only have myself, and if I wasn't happy then I had to live with it and I certainly didn't want to live unhappily.

Someone's cellphone went off. Duo patted down his pockets searching for something.

"Aha, there it is" He said, pulling a sleek black cell out of his left pocket. he flipped it open, "Yeah?". Rei and I stood in silence listening in.

"Oh hey Hilde..."

Hmmm Hilde, hadn't seen her in awhile, probably because Duo had been gone. Of course as soon as he was back in town she was the first know. It was a widely known secret that She had feelings for Duo. There was also a widely known secret that me and Hilde didn't get a long. at all. Since day one I had a bad feeling about her and it never went away. Maybe it was the fact that she clung to Duo like he was god's gift to earth or that she manipulated everybody for her own gain. Whatever Duo felt for her, he never disclosed it to me, so, in the end, I decided it was none of my business. But it was a little odd that they hadn't gotten to together yet. Of course Duo had been gone but.. whatever, I didn't care.

Rei turned to me as Duo continued talking into his phone. "Hey, Ami is still out there dancing. you know dancing, where people get all close, hot, and heavy? Apparently it's fun or something. Wanna give it a try?".

I smiled, "Haha very funny Rei." sparing a last glance at Duo I turned around to Rei."Fine, let's go".

Grabbing Rei's hand we left Duo to his own devices and immersed ourselves into the crowd. Rei was almost immediately separated from me, pulled by a handsome, blond stranger who wanted to dance. Letting her go, I listened to the song and finding the rhythm, swayed my body to it. It wasn't long till I felt arms wrap around my waist and a body press itself against me. I didn't look back. Didn't really want to. Who cared who it was. I was here to dance and if this stranger wanted to dance with me then he could. Our bodies moved together through the song. With his body so close I felt hot and after awhile it was beginning to become uncomfortable. Turning my body, I confronted my dancing partner.

"Hey" he smirked.

"Hey yourself" I replied.

We continued dancing. He was cute, I decided. He donned shaggy, brown hair that fell across hazel eyes. He had the type of face most girls would overlook at first but once you looked at him again you couldn't forget him.

"Come here a lot?" He asked. Must want to make conversation. Ugh, why couldn't we just dance. Of course.. this would be the perfect time to move on..perhaps.

"Not really. you?".

"All the time. Hey wanna leave this dump..We could go back to my place.."

What? Great, it was clear what he had in mind. "No I'm ok thanks."

A second later I felt myself pressed up against his strong chest, his arms crushing me to him.

"You sure you don't wanna change your mind?" He whispered huskily into my ear. Now that I was close I could practically taste the Captain Morgan he apparently had gotten very friendly with.

"I said, no thanks". And tried to pry myself from him.

Suddenly he wasn't so cute anymore.

"And I said you sure you don't want to change your mind".

What was this guy? a broken record. And if possible he had pulled me even closer to him. I felt one of his hands start to trail down my body.

"Get the fuck off me you asshole!" I yelled, and tried to yank myself away.

Panic started to set in and the walls seemed to close in on me.And then he wasn't there anymore. Instead he was on the ground with a bloody nose, knocked out cold. I looked up in surprise to see Duo Shaking his hand in the air. "Damn that hurt" He muttered.

"Duo!" He looked up, and the anger his face once held turned to concern. He rushed over, brushing some bangs plastered to my forehead away.

"You ok?" He asked.

"Yeah I'm fine. Thanks for coming when you did". He was very close. And his eyes pored into mine, searching. I could feel a blush coming on. Why was he so close?

"Hey no problem. Next time you go wandering off, tell me ok. I was wondering where you had gone, I've been looking for you for over fifthteen minutes. Didn't know it was to go off and dance with some creep." He spared a glance at said creep, grimacing.

The notion that Duo had looked for me made me feel warm inside. wait, warm inside?

"Um yeah, well I didn't know he was a creep until he started talking" I said in my defense.

Who did he think I was? Some floozy who was looking for a one night stand? Duo barely acknowledged what i said however and instead grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the edge of the crowd.

"Hey, I'm not done dancing here" I protested.

Duo laughed, "Oh yeah you are. I'm taking you home babe".

I tried to dig my feet in the ground, but to no avail, he was a lot stronger than me. damn it all. Several minutes later we found ourselves back at the bar. Ami and Rei were already there.

"There you are! We've been looking all over for you.. hey you alright, you're all flustered" Rei asked.

"I'm fine, Duo just saved me from some creep".

"Aww my hero. Saving one girl at a time." Rei giggled, placing a hand on Duo's arm.

Duo just shrugged smiling. I frowned, for some reason I didn't like that she was flirting with Duo. Wasn't she with Wufei? I could just picture Wufei getting pissed off. Rei knew that Wufei and Duo didn't get a long very well. Ami just seemed to watch us with mild interest, taking in a sip of her drink every now and then. Rei continued to giggle and compliment Duo. Well someone had to stop Rei, it was obvious she was drunk, yeah, that had it. Time to put a stop to this nonsense.

Grabbing onto Duo's arm I said, "Hey Duo. Didn't you say you were going to drive me home?" I hoped I sounded nonchalant, but the way they looked at me just told me that I probably sounded pushy and overbearing. Great.

"Oh yeah..."

"Yeah, now you remember" I laughed, somewhat too loudly.

what the hell was wrong with me. Rei gave me a quizzical look, like she was trying to figure something out. Oh yeah, she was definitely drunk... I think.

"We're going home now. It was nice seeing you two." I said and started pulling Duo towards the door.

"Bye! Don't forget to call." Ami said over her drink.

Rei was still looking at me like I had grown a second head. "Usagi..." she started, but it was too late, we were already out the door.

"Well you sure wanted to get out of there fast" Duo laughed. He Draped his arm around my shoulders and steered me towards his car.

"Yeah, well I have to wake up early tomorrow morning". liar.

"Ahh, I see, the princess needs her beauty sleep. Perfectly understandable".

I laughed and poked him in his side. "Very funny".

Approaching his car, he opened the passenger side door and I crawled in. The leather seat felt cool against my skin and I felt myself involuntarily relaxing into its embrace. I felt the car rustle and heard Duo get in.

"Ok, where to?".

"Same place I've been living at since you've known me.." I yawned.

"Wow. alright. I think I remember where that is...". He said more to himself than to me. The rest of the ride was in silence. forty five minutes later I found myself snuggled in my down comforter with a smile on my face.

ooooooooooooooooooooo

TBC

Ok sorry about not updating in forever, lost inspiration for a while. But I came back so It's all good. I hope y'all like 1st person point of view better because I do and I think the rest of the story will be that way. anyway that's all. tell me what you think in a review :-D


	4. Chapter Three

Ok updating again, you guys reviewing convinced me ahahaha. anyway, hope you like it :-). And don't forget to review, it inspires me to continue :-D

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailormoon or Gundam Wing

Chapter Three

-------------

I stared at my reflection as I finished putting on my other earring. Their sparkle bounced off the mirror for a mere second as it dangled from my earlobe then settled into place half hidden within my curled hair. I hoped I looked nice and briefly glanced down at myself. I was wrapped in a black chiffon dress. Strapless silk hugged my skin. I had been saving this dress for me and Heero's anniversary, but obviously there had been a change in plans. This dress cost me a fortune, but there was no way Heero was going to ruin me wearing it I decided. But I couldn't help the tug at my heart. What would Heero of thought of it, would he have liked me in it? I frowned, 'stop thinking about Heero' I mentally berated myself. You do not love cheaters, therefore you do not love Heero.

End of story.

On to other topics... Now you all may be wondering where I'm going all dressed up? well the answer was simple. Quatre was holding a business gala. Pretty much Winner Corps. biggest event of the year. If there was a rich successful businessman, he would be at the gala. Once a year, held in July, this was the event to trump all events. I had lost count of the number of cool calculating conversations between men and women as they struck casual business deals. In short, it was a big deal.

And I was invited. If I were anyone else I would feel flattered and awestruck to think I was important enough to be even considered on the guest list. But I was one of Quatre's good friends and it certainly had it's benefits. It was amazing how many people stuttered when they met him. Quatre certainly wasn't imposing or even proper outside of the business world so it was hard matching him to some of the descriptions his co-workers gave him.

"Hey, you ready?" Rei's voice cut through my thoughts as she glided into the room.

I glanced up to take in her appearance. Dressed in a satin red dress that looked practically glued to her with matching red high heels. I inwardly deflated. How was I going to compete with that? I couldn't help the twinge of jealousy that swept through me. Wait, rewind. Me jealous of Rei? Was I out of it? She was my bestfriend. The girl who was there with me through thick and thin and I was jealous of her. 'is that so hard to believe' my conscience asked.

I guess, in truth, it wasn't. Rei always managed to keep her head above water, no matter how tough the circumstances, something I always had trouble with. Anyone would have the right to be a little jealous of someone who had looks, smarts, and sense. I inwardly sighed, stood up and smiled brightly. or at least as brightly as I could manage.

Man, I needed to get out of this slump. It felt like a month ago, but in actuality it was only a week ago that the night at the club happened. I hadn't talked to Duo since but just because I hadn't hear from him didn't convince me he had given up his mission to bring me and Heero back together. Weirdly though, I was slightly disappointed that he hadn't tried to contact me. I mean we hadn't seen each other in a year.

That's a pretty long time in my book. Probably too busy screwing Hilde I thought harshly. That girl really got on my nerves. And the strange part is that I have no evidence to would put her to blame for anything. Just the fact that she constantly intruded on Duo's life. Couldn't she just move on?

"Hey, you alright? You look like you're ready to kill someone" Rei's voice once again sliced through my temperamental thoughts. My face twisted to surprised. I had almost forgotten Rei was there I was so deep in my thoughts. Rei laugh rang throughout my small bedroom, leaving no corner or crevice untouched.

"Don't laugh at me, I was busy trying to figure out the answer to the universe. And now I've lost it. Thanks Rei, I could have solved global warming." I retorted, rightly embarrassed.

"Awww well we'll survive just fine without your genius brain at work. Don't you worry" She teased. "Now are you ready to go? We're going to be late"

"Fine, just let me get my shoes" I murmured and searched the room quickly for them. "aha! there you are!" I announced loudly as I dragged them out from underneath some jeans. Slipping them on I followed Rei down the stairs and out the door.

-------

the chatter of over a eight hundred people bombarded my ears as Rei and I entered the ballroom. I quickly scanned the room but to no avail, couldn't find Quatre.

"Damn, it's a freaking maze of people in here" I muttered angrily.

"You can say that again", Rei murmured in agreeance. In the center of the room various couples danced to the music being played by a large group of violinists and a pianist who stood in the corner, dedicated to their music despite the level of chatter surrounding them. On one side of the room were over a dozen large round tables decorated with centerpieces and gleaming silverware. The other the food was set up, just ready to be brought over for when dinner commenced. Politely we pushed our way through numerous small groups of people deep in conversation. You'd think Rei and I would be belles of the ball, having taken over three hours getting ready. But in reality, what we wore was just the norm among the high socialites of the city. Versace, Vera Wang, Ralph Lauren. All common household names here folks. Disgusting I know.

After what seemed the longest time, and browsing the crowd for Quatre's familiar golden head, I stopped dead in my tracks as I spotted him not fifty feet from where we were standing. But it wasn't necessarily spotting Quatre that had me superglued to the floor. It was the man standing next to him.

Heero Yui.

My heart clenched involuntarily. Shit, I didn't expect this. What was he doing here?! my thoughts screamed. Panic made itself at home as my heart beat erratically. And to top it all off, There was Hilde not two feet away grabbing onto Duo like he was her life support. I felt ready to collapse into a dead heap onto the floor.

"Hey, you found him." Rei said happily. She saw my expression then followed my gaze. "oh no.. I wasn't expecting this" Rei muttered, concern practically dripping off her lips.

"Um.. it's ok. I think I'm going to go freshen up" I managed to croak out. 'Don't you dare cry Usagi'.

"Hey, I'll come with"

"No that's ok. I'll be right back" I said hurriedly and pushed my way through the crowd in the opposite direction. I fought tears as I made my way onto the balcony. The chatter of strangers muted as I walked out onto the stone platform. The sky was cloudy and not a star was in sight, the air was thick of humidity and I could already feel my skin start to moisten. So much for a starry night I thought bitterly. Wasn't that how it was in the movies. I was supposed to be staring at the stars shivering as I longed for my knight in shining armour to come outside in all his glory and say-- "Out here all alone?" a masculine voice teased from behind me. I screamed.

His laugh rang through the air, sounding strangely more intimate since there was nothing for it to bounce off of. I twisted my body around and glared with all my strength. "If you ever scare me like that again Duo.."I warned.

He just smiled, "You'll what? Kill me with that glare of yours? Just to let you know, it's not working." He teased, he spread his arms casually to prove his point."All in one piece". "Whatever Duo. All I'm saying is be careful the next time you start your car." I said nonchalantly. He laughed as if I was kidding. huh, well I'll show him. Well maybe I wouldn't but he didn't have to know that.

"So, what are you doing out here all alone?" His grin now reduced itself to a small smile as he walked up and settled himself beside me.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Just enjoying the night out I suppose" I replied. Now his smile turned into a frown. what? why did he have to look at me as if I were lying. 'maybe because you are lying' my conscience happily informed me. ok so maybe I was lying, it was none of his business.

"Or you're just avoiding Heero" He said.

"Oh, he's here? I didn't notice" I said.

"Uh huh" Duo replied like he wasn't convinced.

"What are you doing out there. Shouldn't you be inside making out with Hilde" I asked, sarcasm making it's home in my words. Duo's eyes darkened and if possible, his frown deepened some more. "Back to hating Hilde I see" he replied with blatant disapproval. I shifted in my stance as his eyes bore into mine.

"Correction, I've always hated Hilde".

"Why?" he asked.

And I was caught off guard. why? even I didn't really know. "I don't know." I bit out. "I just do ok? But it's not like my opinion matters anyway".

Duo sighed, leaned his hip against the railing and crossed his arms as he looked down at me. "Of course it does Usagi. I just don't understand why you two can't get along." Duo explained. "Would it hurt you to be at least a little nicer to her?" He asked. I looked up into his face and suddenly I couldn't refuse what he asked me so endearingly to do. Damnit. Stupid Duo.

"I guess I could try.."I murmured. Instantly Duo's face was enveloped in a radiant smile that not even the devil himself could not reciprocate. I felt my heart flutter unexpectedly because I knew that smile was directed at me and me only.

Between Heero and Duo I was surprised I hadn't had a heart attack yet.

Suddenly a question popped into my head, nagging at my curiosity until I couldn't stand it anymore. "Do you like Hilde?" I blurted out. shit, I did not just ask that. here comes the the awkward silence. you don't ask questions like that I scolded myself. I lowered my gaze and pretended to disappear. "Um sorry, forget I asked." I muttered. There was a silence for almost a minute.

His voice surprised me. "No. I don't" was his answer. I gazed up in surprise, his gaze was intent on mine. He continued, "Hey. let's go back inside." He said soothely. I felt panic at the thought of going back inside. "It's going to be alright. I got you. alright?" He said. I nodded weakly as he took hold of my arm and steered me towards the balcony doors.

I don't particularly remember walking over to our group of friends, just the fact that my heart felt ready to burst. It's thumping rhythm filling up all of my senses.

Quatre, Trowa, Rei, Wufei, Ami, Hilde, and...Heero stood in a loose circle. As we approached I refused to look at Heero then finally I turned my gaze towards everyone's shoes, studied them as if they were the most fascinating things in the room.

"Hey guys, glad you decided to grace us with your presence. Quatre here was starting to worry." Ami laughed. Duo laughed politely and looked over at me expectantly. I glanced up and I laughed also. If you could call it a laugh, more like a dying chuckle. My gaze was once again riveted to the floor. I refused to look up.

I would not look up. Wouldn't. I knew Heero was not four feet away from me. I wanted with my whole heart to look up and stare him down, to make him feel the pain he caused me. But I couldn't because that would show him that I was the weak one. A couple or more things were exchanged. But the tension quickly escalated as they noticed how mute Heero and I were.

"I'm going to go get a drink" I heard Heero abruptly say and watched his shoes disappear out of my line of vision. Finally I looked up my eyes followed him as he made his way over to the food area then into the worried faces of my friends.

"Well... that was fun" Rei joked and looked at me for my reaction. I frowned, then she frowned, probably realizing I didn't find it funny. Quatre coughed. And Trowa shuffled his feet.

I guess they were waiting for me to make it alright to talk again. "So, Quatre the place looks good, you've certainly outdone yourself this year" I smiled. Quatre jumped at the opportunity.

"Thanks. I've spent months on the preparations".

"Well it certainly shows" I replied.

"Hey, Wufei, let's go dance. I can hardly stand still anymore" Rei announced.

"Sure" Wufei replied curtly and the two went off onto the dance floor.

"Oh, it would be so nice to dance. I haven't danced in ages" Hilde exclaimed. I cringed. She was practically inviting Duo to ask her. Well I'd show her. "Duo, would you care for a dance?" I smiled and lifted my hand for him to take.

He grinned, "It would be my pleasure". I glanced over at Hilde to gauge her reaction and inwardly laughed. I could practically see the steam blowing out of her ears. Duo led me towards the dance floor and as soon as we were in the outer corners, encircled his arm around my waist and brought me closer to them.

"Now I hope you've improved on your dancing skills otherwise this is going to be a long song". I stomped on his foot and he cringed.

"Nope, can't say I have" I laughed.

"You little, I oughta..." he growled but he didn't finish, instead he pulled me closer to him, so close I could feel his breath on my face. "...kill you for that" he murmured. I looked up and stared into his eyes and fell. Fell into their depths until I forgot where we were, who we were, and why we were even there. His eyes darkened and I saw them briefly glance towards my parting lips. "Usagi.." he whispered.

"Yes?" I whispered.

Just now realizing how close our lips were, just a couple of more inches..."Sorry for the interruption, but can I dance with my ex-girlfriend", Heero's voice was like a splash of cold water over my entire body.

To say me and Duo jumped in surprise was an understatement, we practically sprung apart. I turned my gaze to see Heero's livid face as he studied us two.

"Yeah, no problem man, I'm going to go get a breath of fresh air" He glanced over at me with a confused expression, and my eyes pleaded with him not to leave me. But he purposely didn't listen and walked away. I wanted to scream, yell, run as faraway as possible while I stared at Duo's retreating form.

I felt Heero's arm close around my waist as he twisted my body towards him and started to lead us through the music. I finally looked up into his gaze was surprised at the raw anger I saw in them. I automatically blushed and couldn't help but tense up.

"Enjoying yourself?" He demanded quietly. Here we go. Time to face the music. no pun intended.

I smiled sweetly, "Actually I am, thanks for asking. you?" He growled and pulled me closer to him, as he leaned over in whispered into my ear.

"Does it look like I am?" his breath caressed my skin and shivered as it sent tingles up my spine. Damnit I wanted to scream. He wasn't supposed to still be affecting me this way. I badly wanted to say yes, but didn't. When Heero was angry it was practical not to push him too far. Of course why did I even give a shit anymore?

"No" I gritted my teeth. Hey, I was trying. Heero seemed to relax at my answer and his face settled back into his everyday emotionless mask. I sighed as I absorbed my ex-lover's features. The hard plains of his face gave nothing away with his aristocratic features. It was only his eyes that held so much emotion and as I gazed into them and his into mine, I had the overwhelming urge to grab onto him and never let go. I felt tears rush up and didn't know how to stop them. Heero's eyes surprisingly softened and I felt his thumb wipe away the first trail of tears that made their way down my face.

"How's life with Relena?" I managed to choke out.

"There is nothing between me and Relena. Never has been, never will be." He uttered with a finality that held no openings for a retort. I scoffed loudly. Heero's next words crushed me. "Just because we aren't in love anymore doesn't mean I ever cheated on you Usagi". How could he even say that? How could he just simply say he didn't love me anymore. What kind of person was he I wanted to shout. Why did he come over here to just tell me once again that I was now nothing to him.

"Thanks for reminding me Heero. Now I know why I had decided to say goodbye all those months ago". His eyes flashed with hurt for a brief second before he spoke again. Like he had any right to be hurt, he was the one to said he didn't love me!

"Hilde was practically dying of heartbreak standing by herself in a corner, so I decided to pull Duo away from you. Good thing I did too". And suddenly his anger was back again. What was his problem?

"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked angrily. He ignored my question and just frowned. We settled into a tension filled silence as our bodies moved to the music.

"How's work been going?" I decided to ask, desperate to break the ice, maybe to even just hear his voice, maybe..

"Fine, my boss has been pushing me real hard to get those papers in. Our company is in a real crunch right now" He explained. I nodded in sympathy. Heero worked very hard at the preventers. It wasn't easy being the engineer for all their buildings. Though he played a small part in a big picture, he was one of the backbones for the preventer's headquarters. It was funny though, I never pictured Heero as a designer. But whatever floats your boat I guess. Some people just had weird passions that didn't fit their personality at all, and I guess Heero was one of them. I nodded in understanding just as the song ended and I felt his arms leave my body.

"I..." I began but he cut me off.

"I'll see you around". And then he left.

------------

It was 12:35 A.M.and the gala was still in full swing. I glanced around the room and my eyes briefly fell upon Relena in the corner of the room. When had she arrived I wondered, a couple of seconds later I saw her leave the ballroom. Heero had long ago disappeared along with Duo, and Wufei. Where they went to was the question of the hour but I tried not to dwell on it too much, considering I was having so much fun with Rei and Ami.

Well maybe not so much fun, but their company was still filling my chest with laughter, mostly because Rei was wasted off of all the champagne. Ami and I laughed again as Rei almost tripped.

"Ok guys, I need to take a bathroom break. I'll be back" I said that last part in my shoddy Arnold Schwarzenegger accent.

Rei giggled, "Asta la vista" and made a gun with her finger, narrowed one eye on my form and shot her imaginary bullet complete with sound effects.

Ami laughed, "I think it's almost your bedtime Rei"

"Shut up!" Rei retorted. I laughed and walked away.

Again I swerved through the crowd until I came upon the double doors leading into the halls. I turned the handle and stepped out, the door closing behind with a resounding bang.

All noise was abruptly cut off and I was left in silence, my only company was the click click of my heels on the marble tiles. Now where was the bathroom again? God this place was huge. I glanced upon each door as I passed, yet still no sign. Maybe I was going the wrong wa--a muffled scream penetrated the silence and my body went shock still.

I stopped walking. My heart pounded as I strained my ears for anymore noise. There was none. Maybe I was imagining things. No one screamed, because that was just crazy, nothing bad happens in deserted hallways. right. I tried to continue walking, but I found my legs couldn't move.

'Move damn you!' I ordered my feet, but they stood their ground, not cooperating. I sighed and leaned against the wall. I felt my shoulder blades press against hard marble wall and tried to relax, closing my eyes and concentrating on my breathing.

'It was nothing Usagi, just your imagination'. I felt my heart beat slow down as finally felt my composure return. I opened my eyes, and glanced around the hall in both directions. Still nobody. I pushed myself off the wall but before I took one step further, I leaned down and plucked off both my high heels. No way was I making any noise letting know anyone where I was. I took hesitant steps in the direction I was heading. As soon as I came upon a corner I stopped and slowly poked my head out.

Nothing.

I released a breath I realized I had been holding. I looked and almost laughed with relief. A glowing restroom sign stood above two doors. I made my way over, and shook my head. I was really losing it. I continued to laugh to myself until I felt something stick to the bottom of my right foot. Stupid people and their gum. no not gum, something slick though. I lifted up my foot to look at the mystery substance and stumbled back, landing on the floor. red. whatever it was, was red. blood. no, it couldn't be. I scrambled onto my hands and knees and leaned close to the ground.

A small puddle, hardly even noticeable unless you happened to be barefoot and step in it. I hesitantly dipped a finger into it, brought it to my nose and sniffed. a metallic odor penetrated deep into my nostrils. I gagged and pushed the finger away. There was no if's, it was certainly blood. I suddenly wanted to be anywhere but where I was. And the distinct muffled scream drifted back into my memory. Until the smell of the blood and the sound of that scream swam around in my head. I glanced farther along and found something. A lipstick.I reached to pick it up but decided against it. The sick feeling in my stomach hadn't left. I stood shakily to the ground. Something wrong happened. It had to have. What other reason could there be?

"Miss, is there something wrong?" I nearly screamed as a man dressed in a suit had come around the corner.

"Blood..there's blood?" I murmured and pointed to the spot. He look confused but followed my gaze. He laughed. My mouth dropped open.

"Right lady, blood". "you don't believe me? I think I know what blood looks like". He just smirked, "too much champagne huh?" I just frowned.

This jerk was really getting on my nerves. "Well if it isn't blood then what is it?".

He shrugged, "Look, it could be blood, I did see a girl bust her lip back in the ball room, maybe some of it got on the floor on the way to the bathroom".

I looked at him then back at the blood. There was barely any there. Maybe... finally I laughed, "Man, I'm paranoid tonight".

He smiled, "Hey, it happens to the best of us" he replied, "now if you excuse I really have to use the men's room" I finally noticed I was blocking the door and blushed.

"Sorry about that." I mumbled and stepped out of the way. He smiled in response and walked past me into the men's room.

-  
Ok not really a cliffhanger or anything. I almost made the chapter longer but decided against it. Sorry for any grammar mistakes, didn't really go into major editing or anything. Well hope you review, tell me what you think, and I'll try to update sooner :-) 


End file.
